Seduction is actually a behavior that can fit in a code of good manners and can take different forms depending on education, culture, need to love and be loved, fear of loneliness, fear of remaining single all your life or not having a child or desire to be like everyone else.
For a person to be seductive, she must first get to know herself very well so she can learn a whole variety of behaviors that would highlight her intellectual and physical qualities which she can personalize to obtain a new personality. Most people prefer to say “this is me and people need to like me the way I am”. Well, this is where the problem is, you are who you are based on all your life experience, because since you were born you got from the external environment depending on the circumstances and other people’s behaviors a piece which become a part of you. In short you are a puzzle consisting of all that you meet along life.
A course about seduction helps you discover which are the good parts that you took over and which are the bad parts, so you can work on the best and maybe learn some new ones to help you become better.
So to be able to be seductive you have to learn to work on some aspects related to the conscious or unconscious fears and behaviors which can make you become more seductive. For that I will try to summarize the few distinct themes, very important when it comes to seduction:
- Fear of loneliness;
- Fear of being too late to form a couple;
- Fear of being too late to have a baby;
- Fear of being abandoned;
- Fear of being judged by your family, friends or not to be considered weird because you do not have someone;
Here are also few behaviors that can prevent you to be seductive:
- The way you dress;
- The way you communicate, verbally or nonverbally, tone or words used;
- The two dysfunctional eating behaviors: anorexia and bulimia;
- Environment where you try to find a partner;
- The time you invest to find a partner;
- The way you behave with the partner you already have;
- Sexuality too early or too late;
- Couple Sexuality: too much or too little;
- Family, friends or colleagues opinions who advise you better or worse depending on their own experiences;
- Sleep: the quality and quantity;
- Eating: quality and quantity;
- Sport: if you find a type of sport who suits you or not, if you do too much or too little;
- Despair, disillusionment, fear.
- Depression, anxiety or any other form of psychological disorder.
All of these can make you be seductive or not, can help you find a partner easier, or can make you keep him easily or not.
Constantin Cornea, Psychotherapist and Life Coach